A Prior Despair by Scott Cairns

After Kavafy

When I saw that I had lost her     completely, I sought the dulcet

taste of her on the lips of each     subsequent woman, her fragrant

flesh in the fold of every lover's     nape thereafter, and her heat

welling with my own and drawing     out an urgency in each

ambiguous woman met     in that tortured interim.

When I saw that I had lost her     I was lost, and held

my eyes shut tight that I might so     delude my wits as to trust

that it was she receiving me,     that it was she returning

with delight the urgent drive     against the unbearable

distance--two bodies, struggling     toward agreeable repose.

Then, tasting once a sudden kiss     so suddenly presented,

I saw another prospect rise     to view, and knew reprieve

from the familiar ring of hell,     from which I rose and marveled

at the offer of another life     whose heat and heady fragrance

rose, delirious to burn     deliciously, and not consume. 

(In celebration of National Poetry Month, I am sharing a poem each day this month.)